Gill Moakes (00:01.576)
Thank you so much for joining me today. How are you?
Abi Adams (00:05.91)
I, do you know what? I'm so good, thank you sweetheart. I really am. I've been enjoying this start to the year and it's a, what a pleasure to be here with you. How are you?
Gill Moakes (00:11.56)
I'm glad to hear that.
Gill Moakes (00:19.816)
I am really well. I'm really well. I've been so looking forward to this conversation because when we first started talking, I remember thinking, oh, you know, I don't know if I'm in or not because I'm just about finishing my periods now. So I didn't know. I don't know. For some reason I was thinking, oh, you know, you work more with women who are in.
Oh fucking hell. Lena, take all of that out. I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about. Get that bit out, Lena. For God's sake. I'm just... Yeah, just come back to that minute. Yeah, I'm so excited to be having this conversation because obviously I am almost postmenopausal. I don't know if that that possible to be almost postmenopausal? I think I am. I'm nearly there.
Abi Adams (00:55.51)
it.
Abi Adams (01:11.126)
You're coming to the, yeah, you're in that realm. Yeah, you've passed through the majority of that place. Yeah.
Gill Moakes (01:14.28)
I'm coming to the end. Yeah. But I'm going to be completely honest with you. There are so many things about being a woman and the phases that we go through and that I just don't even understand myself. I really don't. And I am so captivated by what you do, Abby, because you have this incredible understanding on it. You've done so much work around this. So I'd love it if we could just kick off with you.
kind of explaining to everyone who you are and like what you do and what's brought you to what you do now.
Abi Adams (01:47.958)
Thank you very much. So hello world. My name is Abbey and I am a speaker, a mentor. I'm a movement coach. And I'm supposed you could call me the visionary founder of Project Woman, which is your choice, your voice, your body. And you can communicate that however you want. It is not an age thing.
It is an every woman thing. And that is, that can be quite hard in this world to get across. And this is something that I'll be honest with you that perhaps I struggle with because we're so put into categories. You are either a young woman, you're a middle -aged woman, or you're an old woman. And then if you can get in one of those boxes, please. Yeah, get one of those boxes. And that makes our life really easy. Yeah. And then we can all just carry on doing what we're doing. But I don't want to do that anymore.
Gill Moakes (02:30.278)
Isn't that true?
Abi Adams (02:40.95)
Because what I know so deeply is that when you bring all of these evolutionary phases together, the wisdom thread gets stitched even deeper. And what I mean by that is, and I'll give you an example, when 900 ,000 women left their jobs in the UK because of reaching menopause and realizing that they'd had enough and they was going to go out and live their life the way they wanted to. I much prefer that than them not believing that they was good enough.
What we saw here was those wonderful women with the wisdom and experience not being able to pass that on to the next generation. That's what makes me really sad because I know how deeply stories inspire us and the way that a woman tells a story is phenomenal. And so this is what Project Woman is all about. It's about bringing...
Gill Moakes (03:11.494)
Yeah.
Abi Adams (03:35.286)
all women together to weave our wisdom but to speak loudly and to reach out and to talk and to ask and to experience our health in vibrancy. Vibrancy and value that is what I am so passionate about. Yeah I think that answered your question.
Gill Moakes (03:55.528)
did? Well it absolutely. But how did it all come about? What's the origins? I want the origin story. You're right because we are, as women we're so good at telling stories and I just love listening to them. So I want to know what the origin stories, what's brought you to this work?
Abi Adams (04:15.158)
So I've always been in health and wellbeing. I've lived in India and Thailand studying the art of yoga and yoga therapy and Thai massage. I've always been fascinated by the body. But it was when I was in the States studying MMA where I'm moving my body eight to 10 hours a day, it was very intense. Where my bleed became 28 days, it wasn't painful. It...
the emotional landscape was like watching the most beautiful sunrise and sunset ever. There was no conflict there whatsoever. And it wasn't this heavy, overflowing bleed that I was so used to. So when I returned, I started to look into it, blown away by what I didn't know about my body. Blown away at how I had habits and rituals within this cycle that I wasn't even aware of.
Gill Moakes (05:03.184)
Hmm?
Abi Adams (05:11.19)
One of the biggest ones was on day 21 where my addiction to alcohol would come out because I felt so low, because I felt like I was a failure when in fact it was just a change in hormone, like progesterone and estrogen changing their levels, where then I could make greater choices about how I looked after myself and where I wasn't reaching for two bottles of red wine at that point in time and the liberation from that. So when people ask me,
Why do I need to know about my menstrual cycle? Why do I need to know about my blood? Because it is the ultimate relationship. It is the foundational relationship that you build with yourself and how that echoes out to everyone else. Because the way you do anything, anything is the way you do everything. So the relationship you have with you is the foundation to every single relationship in your life. And once you understand that,
Gill Moakes (05:55.174)
Mm. Mm.
Abi Adams (06:05.558)
by looking at your cycle and you go into your inner rhythm, the easier life becomes.
Gill Moakes (06:15.24)
So this is something that I've, I mean, I've, I don't think I've ever heard of anyone referred to having a relationship with their bleed. I mean, and I, you know, I'm 55 now. I feel like I have this chunk of knowledge missing. And this is sadness a little bit, but it's a bit bloody late for me now.
Abi Adams (06:16.15)
That was it.
Gill Moakes (06:43.176)
But there's a joy that it's going to be there for the next generations. But there is a bit of a sadness and a bit of a resentment, I suppose, that this isn't something that's been talked about through my generation. I grew up with very much that you didn't. It was the opposite. You didn't talk about it. You would be embarrassed. The thought of a tampon falling out of your handbag would have been your ultimate embarrassment.
Right? Which the more you actually think and confront that, the more ridiculous it is, right? It's so ridiculous. So...
Abi Adams (07:18.294)
Yeah, absolutely. It's because it's a natural, it's so natural.
Gill Moakes (07:24.712)
There's nothing more natural for us, is there? So Project Women then, how did it come about and what does it... Sorry, I've already asked how it came about. Lena, take that out. So Project Women, like, what is the project? What is it about? What does it do for women?
Abi Adams (07:29.468)
Absolutely.
Abi Adams (07:48.374)
Well, if I tell you where the bomb, the mic drop came for Project Woman, I was in a cafe in Soho with my husband and my first child. And I was looking at a local magazine and in there was Project Zero, which is the charity that is out there promoting healthy oceans and seas. And they spoke about these dead zones in the waters. And I sat down and I went, bloody hell. I said, that's a womb.
Gill Moakes (07:56.712)
Yeah.
Abi Adams (08:17.206)
the dead zone, it's like a what? And it just blew my mind. And then all of a sudden it was like Project Woman. It just literally dropped into my head and I was like, absolutely. And from there, it was an online course where it was moving with your cycle, which then turned into the community online that it is now, which then turned into Project Woman TV, which then turned into the Project Woman experience, which is a weekend where we gather wonderful women and we just have a really great time and focus on our health.
Gill Moakes (08:30.088)
Right.
Abi Adams (08:45.312)
A woman to that, I hear you say. But what is the project? Well, it's turning female health into a valuable source of power. Because for a very long time, it's been an inconvenience, it's been ignored, it's been abused, it's been manipulated. And when you look back through history,
Gill Moakes (08:49.016)
Yeah?
Abi Adams (09:14.166)
You can see just how badly a woman's body has been treated. You know, just, I was having this conversation today. It was only up until the nineties that it wasn't considered rape for a man to have sex whenever he wanted, because if he was married, it was his right. I mean, the nineties, I was 16 in the nineties, you know?
Gill Moakes (09:34.492)
Isn't that just... that blows my mind!
Abi Adams (09:41.718)
Right?
Gill Moakes (09:41.928)
So a woman could not be raped by her husband until the 90s.
Abi Adams (09:48.278)
No, because it was his marri... it was his marital right to have sex whenever he wanted.
Gill Moakes (09:52.468)
Yeah.
Gill Moakes (09:57.416)
It just defies belief. It completely defies belief.
Abi Adams (10:03.574)
So when you look back in time, you can see that really and truthfully, a woman has not had permission of her own body. Through centuries, we have not had permission of our own bodies. But now we're starting to get this because of communities and conversations such as this. But we are still seeing, in all honesty, a medicalization of female health, where the first port of call is to put her on medication without asking what...
Gill Moakes (10:10.15)
Mm.
Abi Adams (10:33.046)
How do you feel? What do you need? You know, all of these really important questions, which could just turn, lead to, she's not feeling supported in a relationship. Work is too much, but she doesn't, she's afraid of saying anything in case she loses her job. It could be that she's had a distorted relationship with her food and perhaps she could do with some support there. You know, all of these wonderful conversations that they're so small that,
Gill Moakes (10:38.216)
Mm.
Gill Moakes (10:52.294)
Mm.
Abi Adams (11:02.934)
we think of them as irrelevant, but they are a game changer in regards to female health. It is so important to look at the lifestyle first before we start to consider medication and then we piece everything together. I think this is such an important topic to open up with because we're seeing so many women head straight to the HRT.
Gill Moakes (11:05.638)
Mm.
Gill Moakes (11:15.976)
Right.
Abi Adams (11:28.822)
But then over the course of years, realising that this actually isn't working for them, but they're not giving any other opportunity or choice. And they're thinking...
Gill Moakes (11:37.224)
I was so glad you mentioned that because that's the one obviously from my age bracket, I guess that's the question that everyone's, you know, all of my friends are really kind of toying with at the moment is shall I or shan't I? And it's not so much shall I do that or shall I do this? It's shall I do that or shall I do nothing?
So it's almost like I think most women believe there aren't any other choices. It's just where you can go on HRT or you just weather the storm. I'm interested in what are our other choices?
Abi Adams (12:13.334)
Yeah. But you know what?
Abi Adams (12:18.998)
Do you know what, if I could tell you, if we put more joy into your female health, you're going to get a lot more from it. Give me that. Give me that time to show you more joy. And I promise you, you'll see a change. And then if you still want to go on the HRT, then go on the HRT. But know what you're doing. Know what you're doing to your body. Know what choices you have.
Gill Moakes (12:37.488)
Mm.
Abi Adams (12:46.71)
because there's so much more out there. I mean, I've had the privilege of interviewing this week on Project Woman TV, Jane Hardwick Collins, a legend, an Australian legend who started out in midwifery and she's now a leading edge voice in female health. And what she points out so beautifully is just because you're going through menopause and your hormone levels are changing, it doesn't mean your body stops making those hormones. But what happens is if you take something outside of yourself to help you make them,
Gill Moakes (12:47.376)
Mm -hmm.
Abi Adams (13:16.246)
As you go through this transition, the body almost kind of switches off because it doesn't need to do it. So you don't even give your body the opportunity to step into its power and its wisdom and to create those hormones as you pass through menopause. I find that fascinating. Now I'm not saying that menopause doesn't come with its trials and tribulations. Some women go through it, other women sail through it.
Gill Moakes (13:23.4)
Yeah.
Gill Moakes (13:34.92)
Hmm. Hmm.
Abi Adams (13:44.118)
But what I have been educated with by so many wise women is that when you go through this, you experience a side of yourself that is revolutionary. Your, what we call the bullshit switch is switched off and you step into this power. And as one woman said to me the other day, you become unfucking.
Gill Moakes (13:45.256)
Absolutely.
Gill Moakes (14:06.028)
Absolutely.
Abi Adams (14:13.398)
And I was like, this sounds amazing. She said, you are not worried about being a sex object for the opposite sex, but you want to feel sexy for you. She said, so you do not care. You are unfuckable. And the power in that is phenomenal to not care. How great does that feel?
Gill Moakes (14:26.076)
Mm.
Gill Moakes (14:37.32)
I mean, you're so right. I was just reading, it's reminding me, I was just reading yesterday Elizabeth Gilbert article that she's written. I can't remember what it was for. It was one of those things where, you know, when a journalist gives you set questions and people would like do the answers and Elizabeth Gilbert was writing about it. She's recently shaved her hair off and stopped wearing makeup. And she said that she has never.
felt more like herself than she does right now. When she looks in the mirror and she sees every bit of herself, she sees the shape of her head, she sees her actual skin, she has never felt more comfortable with herself in all her life. And as I was reading that, I was getting goosebumps and I was thinking, I can, I'm not going to shave my hair off, but do you know what? I can kind of identify with what she's saying that...
How bloody liberating to actually step into that level of authenticity around just who you are, that comfort with who you are. And I guess that, that unfuckableness of, I'm so comfortable with who I am, my stake is firmly in the ground. There's nothing you can say that's gonna sway me because I'm here.
Abi Adams (16:05.11)
Yeah. Well, when you also look at, you know, like the true depths of a lot of the medicine towards female health was to basically shut us up. Because when we come to this point, you see all of these wonderful women start to get angry, start to feel these emotions, but they're not allowed to express them, are they? Because it's not the time and the place. You can't do it here. That's not okay. You need to pull it together. You need to sort yourself out.
Gill Moakes (16:15.622)
Yeah.
Gill Moakes (16:19.118)
Yes.
Abi Adams (16:34.902)
And so it's easier to take a pill for that to keep that all down. But can you imagine if you had a space like Project Woman where you could just go, rawr! And everyone went, bravo. Absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. Same again next week. Yeah. And I...
Gill Moakes (16:47.72)
Well done. Well done. Good roll.
Gill Moakes (16:54.792)
Yeah, I wonder.
Fudget woman, it sounds amazing.
Abi Adams (17:02.71)
Come and join us, come and join us. Everyone is welcome, everyone is welcome. There was something you said earlier.
Gill Moakes (17:03.56)
It sounds so good. Yes, I need to. Where do you, like, where do you do your weekends?
Abi Adams (17:12.406)
So these are going to be taking place at the start of every season for all women to get in their natural flow and power. The next one is coming up in March. This is the 15th to 17th of March in the Men Dip Hills in the most beautiful manor house in the swimming pool, Suno and Chikuzi. And we look at our female health. We're going to go into the cycles of life, how we can layer our cycles of our feminine health.
to support our work, to support our family, but to find that real natural rhythm that is exciting and passionate and creative and inspiring. We have hormone loving foods.
Gill Moakes (17:51.4)
really interested in this rhythm.
Abi Adams (17:54.902)
Let's talk about rhythm.
Gill Moakes (17:56.84)
I'm really interested in this rhythm because that is something that you said to me about how when we're energy efficient, we're not managed by time. Is that something that you look at when you're on your like, when you have your weekends that because that's I'm really captivated by that.
Abi Adams (18:20.054)
Absolutely. It's the core of what Project Woman stands for and the work that I offer. We are energy efficient. We run on energy. And this is when you understand the cycle. And this is why it's so important to understand the menstrual cycle while you have it, because you start to understand where your zones of genius are, where your pockets of energy are, where creativity, cognitive function, all of these have their place in your cycle so that then...
Gill Moakes (18:26.152)
Ooh, tell me more.
Abi Adams (18:50.006)
you are not forcing and fighting yourself and stressing your nervous system out, trying to do something. So as an example, you've got to write your newsletter and it just ain't in you, but you've, you believe you've got to do it right now. And so your nervous system is now so fired up and you end up creating something. When you look back, you think, Oh my goodness, what was that? That's the inner rhythm. When you find you in a rhythm,
Gill Moakes (19:07.208)
Push through.
Mm.
Gill Moakes (19:16.648)
Yeah.
Abi Adams (19:19.254)
You sit down and you know, right today is the day I'm going to write that newsletter. Oh my goodness. It just comes out. Then the following, following week, it's all about communication. So you've got all your meetings in there. You've got your presentations. And then the week after that, it's about reflection and you're looking over everything and analyzing and seeing what works and what you don't want to do anymore. This is the rhythm.
And what I want to point out is you do not lose your inner rhythm when you go through menopause. This is not true because you are still producing certain amounts of hormones, not as much as what we were in our menstruating years, but you're still producing them. And guess what? You're still alive. So as you're alive, you're still going to be connected and you're still going to be rhythm in. It's there. But what we do with the menopause is we give the lunar calendar some time.
Gill Moakes (19:55.4)
Mm -hmm.
Gill Moakes (19:59.944)
You're fine.
Abi Adams (20:11.616)
what this does, some women are sensitive to the lunar energy, some women aren't, but what this enables a woman to do is to plan. And she can plan various projects, family time, but the most important thing is that she plans rest. We all need it. We all need it. And we do not give ourselves enough of it. And this is why in a rhythm cycles are so important because I bet you, if you look back,
Gill Moakes (20:28.552)
Hmm.
Gill Moakes (20:34.408)
No.
Abi Adams (20:40.278)
When was the last time you gave yourself a break? When was the last time you took some time out?
Gill Moakes (20:46.12)
I mean, and this is particularly for women who love what they do. So I love what I do so much. It doesn't really feel like work. You know, I get paid to have interesting conversations with incredible women as a coach, right? That really shouldn't be called work. But still, you know, it is draining.
Even even though I love it so much, it's tiring. It's draining and I hardly ever give myself a break. I have the ever take time out and I so yeah, this would completely resonates with me. This idea of planning rest, I think is a is really we plan everything else right as business owners, especially my audience are mostly business female business owners.
We are really good at planning. We plan the shit out of everything. You know, we plan our social media like a demon. But plan rest? What?
Abi Adams (21:54.294)
I know. Well, it's not valuable, is it? Rest isn't valuable. You know, we don't want people to rest. They need to be doing, doing, doing. And here lies the issue. Here lies the problem. Like I said earlier, before we jumped on, my darling, you know, I'm in my inner autumn now. The season and the phase, the luteal phase that is coming into my bleed. And for me, you can feel the world is starting to slow down.
Gill Moakes (22:01.)
But of course it is! Yes!
Gill Moakes (22:08.838)
Mm.
Abi Adams (22:20.662)
and it feels a bit harder if I'm trying to push something. So I'm not gonna start anything new here. I'm not gonna start picking up something and promoting it. In fact, I'm not on social media as much. I'm doing the minimum, if I'm being honest with you, of what excites me. There's a difference when it feels easy and if it excites me, I'll do that. But this is me doing my movement. I do more movement now. I'll get on the piano. I'll get my drawing out. I'll get creative.
Gill Moakes (22:21.318)
Mm.
Gill Moakes (22:26.312)
Mm -hmm.
Gill Moakes (22:36.378)
Yep.
Abi Adams (22:48.982)
because that's what nourishes me. And it's amazing how the ideas start coming in or the solutions to something start coming in. But I won't act on it now. I'll keep it there. But I'm not going to act on it now because this isn't the time. And again, I'm not going to stress myself out. I'm worth more than that. And we know that as we head towards menopause that our adrenals are what take over the production of the sex hormones from the ovaries as they, as they retire and go on holiday somewhere nice and hot, I hope.
And so if we're stressed out with all of this cortisol images, do you think the adrenals are going to have time to create the sex hormones that you really need? They're not. So let's get that stress in the sweet spot. Let's get into that inner rhythm, that deep inner rhythm, which evokes your intuition. And when you evoke your intuition, you spark your power center. And that is where the unfuckable lies.
Gill Moakes (23:17.8)
Yes.
Gill Moakes (23:28.326)
Mm -hmm. Right.
Abi Adams (23:47.572)
That is where the confidence sits. And I tell you, when you truly tap into that, no one will ever take that away from you, ever. They can't.
Gill Moakes (23:48.04)
Hmm.
Gill Moakes (24:00.328)
No? Well, it's because it's who you become, isn't it?
Abi Adams (24:05.622)
Yeah, absolutely.
Gill Moakes (24:06.92)
So just thinking about the this kind of seasons of things, you know, like this autumn season. So something that really interested me earlier, and I hope you don't mind me sharing it, I know you won't mind me sharing it, was that you brought over a board with some writing on.
Abi Adams (24:27.83)
My board?
Gill Moakes (24:28.936)
So share with, so for those who are listening and not watching, mainly because I probably won't put it on YouTube anyway, so I don't know what I'm talking about. How would you have even seen that ever? This is my brain fog.
For those who are just listening, Abby has this board and it's got lots of little writing and little things that she wants to remember and it's got little prompts and stuff that she wants to remember and she said to me, do you mind if I just bring this up because, you know, this is the phase I'm in and this is how it presents itself so this is useful for me and it means I don't get stressed out about trying to remember something because I've got it here. And honestly Abby, that just like...
Yeah, that really has given me pause for thought. I wish we could all learn to be that transparent. And so, so many levels to be that transparent, to be practical about what we actually need and allow and allow ourselves to have it, the help or the support or the, you know, the props, whatever that is. So, so I wanted to thank you first of all for doing that, because I thought that was just so sensible, so sensible.
But what else, this kind of autumn time for you, and I don't know if I'm autumn or if I'm going into winter, I don't know what that is. You said it is a time of slowing down. What does that mean for us as business owners, as women that still have ambition, as women who still have things they want to achieve? Like, what do we do with that? Yeah.
Abi Adams (26:07.158)
Well, it just sounds scary, doesn't it? When you say slow down, I mean, it immediately evokes a sense of panic. Like, are you kidding me? Do you know what I've got to do? Do you know what I need to support? Blah, blah, blah. All of that comes up, doesn't it?
Gill Moakes (26:17.64)
Yeah, honestly, yeah, that's what comes up for me. It's like, no, I'm sorry, I have no time to slow down right now.
Abi Adams (26:23.606)
When I say slow down, perhaps that's not the right words. What it means is, is that you are coming to a point where you believe that you have done enough. And from that point, you are only going to do what is necessary. And everything else is more about you. So here would be the great time to book yourself into yoga. It's not that you're not doing anything.
It's not that you just literally stop, sit on the sofa with a bucket of ice cream. I mean, if you want to do that, great, go for it. But this is more about coming into that sense of self and valuing yourself where you can say, no, I'm not going to do that. That can wait until next cycle. I don't have that energy right now. This phase and zone that I am in.
Gill Moakes (26:52.486)
Mm -hmm.
Gill Moakes (26:58.248)
Yeah
Gill Moakes (27:12.104)
Mm -hmm.
Abi Adams (27:17.718)
is about reflection. It's about rest because I know that the hormones are dropping off here and I require some time out. I require some time to reflect on myself and my needs as I go into this next cycle. And this is what I mean.
When we talk about time, this is why we've not got no time. It's because we don't work on time. We work on energy. And the Native Americans have this down so beautifully. They work on cycles. They work on rhythm. They work on season. We work in circle. There is no time there. And this is why we don't have it. Because if you look at, there's time everywhere. Why do we not have enough of it? Because it is a cycle.
Gill Moakes (27:42.79)
Yeah.
Abi Adams (28:03.67)
really and truthfully when we get into that. So if you can look at that and you start to look at that point within your cycle, which is your inner autumn, which is your, the latter half of your luteal phase, you will literally feel when you start tracking your cycle, when you start tracking your inner rhythm and feeling into it, you can literally feel like you are detaching from the world. It feels, it feels as if you can't quite touch something. Do you know what I mean? Like fuzzy. It kind of feels like that.
Gill Moakes (28:30.632)
Mm.
Abi Adams (28:33.078)
How on earth are you going to do anything or create a communication when the energy isn't there to support it? And then this is when we drive ourselves into the sense of failure because it doesn't go right. It doesn't go as well as what we thought it would. And that's because we are spending energy that we don't have. We are making our body do things that it doesn't quite have the stuff for. Does that make sense?
Gill Moakes (29:00.84)
Yeah, it makes complete sense. So, so what came up for me when you were saying that was how nonsensical is this, this busyness that we're in all the time this you know, I don't have time for that I don't have time for this I don't have time for that. And how.
kind of ridiculous that is against the frame of there is an actual rhythm for everything. So if there's something that you don't have time for, it's either because it's not right for you or it's because you're prioritizing something else that isn't right for you. You know, like, I guess what you're saying is that if we can get more intentional, more tuned in with what is right for us at the season we're in.
Those feelings of not having time will take care of themselves because you will naturally move with your energetic rhythm.
Abi Adams (29:57.046)
Absolutely. And your emotional landscape becomes easier to navigate. You know, within each of the seasons within your cycle. So just to point out your inner winter is your bleed. Your inner spring is mid follicular. Your inner summer is ovulation. And then your luteal or your late luteal is your inner autumn. And within each of those, which is which is what the Red School educates on so beautifully is
Gill Moakes (30:02.344)
Yeah.
Gill Moakes (30:09.736)
Oh.
Abi Adams (30:26.038)
There is an emotional landscape that you move around in within these seasons and each one offers you the opportunity to tap into that emotional landscape. You will find that in your inner summer, your ovulation, you are more magnetic because at that time you're trying to ovulate, you're trying to attract a partner, you're wanting to really procreate. So you with the testosterone and the estrogen and then the progesterone started to come in and said, these wonderful hormones.
are giving you this co -initive confidence that you are able to communicate. You might be able to feel this where you feel like you wake up and your hair looks great. You know, it just sits perfectly. And an interesting factor is that ovulation, your face is more symmetrical because you're trying to attract a mate. I find that phenomenal. So it's all going great. Isn't it? This is all about communication.
Gill Moakes (31:13.448)
That's crazy. My...
Gill Moakes (31:21.168)
Mm.
Abi Adams (31:22.55)
in your inner autumn, we all know what it's like, you know, just before your bleed, a lot of it, we just don't have that motivation. You don't really have the, the, uh, to want to get on social media, do you? You think, oh, could you not?
Gill Moakes (31:33.776)
Yeah.
Abi Adams (31:36.224)
Why do that? Why force yourself at a point when the productivity of what you're trying to achieve just isn't there and then you look back and you think that was awful. Why did I do that?
Gill Moakes (31:51.08)
You're so right. You're so right. When you try and force yourself, like the thing you said earlier about the newsletter. Oh God, I can really feel that. I can, I could look back now at past emails I've sent out and I will be able to guarantee how I was feeling in the moment when I wrote that, because when I'm feeling, you know, all it, everything's in alignment and it's flowing. The words are great. I'm feeling good. It's completely different. When I can feel I've just forced the...
hell out of it and it's just been really difficult. Just doesn't even read like me. It's awful. So I suppose, so for people listening this inner rhythm of productivity, what is something that women listening can do to begin, especially if this is something new to them, if they've never really thought about how their female health really permeates.
Abi Adams (32:24.406)
Yeah. Yeah.
Gill Moakes (32:47.174)
everything in their life in terms of how they feel about themselves and about what they're doing any season in life. What's something that women can start doing to get more awareness for that natural rhythm? Where can they start?
Abi Adams (33:03.286)
So firstly, how long is your cycle? You need to know how long it is. So we usually say over the course of three months, give yourself three months so you can start to see your habits, yeah? And you can look back. Over the course of three months, track your emotional landscape. So how you're feeling, you know, habits that come up. It could be about food, it could be about exercise, it can be about work, you know, you can write anything down.
Gill Moakes (33:08.516)
Right.
Gill Moakes (33:17.35)
Mm -hmm.
Abi Adams (33:31.574)
And then after your three months, you look back and you're like, Oh, there, oh look, day 15. I'm really great at organizing. Day 14. Oh, I done really well at that speaking gig. That went really well. And so you start to piece that together because it is, it's just a puzzle. It's just a puzzle until you get that point where you know, right.
Gill Moakes (33:43.536)
Mm -hmm.
Gill Moakes (33:53.768)
Hmm.
Abi Adams (33:58.198)
That zone of genius goes there. That zone of genius goes there. That zone of genius goes there. And it's almost like your, what do they call them? Mystic Meg, septic peg. What was their name? You know, we're like the horoscopes back in the day. Do you remember? It's like you've got your own prediction going on. You know, I mean, just imagine what that, just take a moment to feel what it feels like.
Gill Moakes (34:10.536)
Oh, septic peg? Crystal ball?
Accept it, Peg, yeah!
Gill Moakes (34:24.272)
Mm.
Abi Adams (34:27.286)
You know next month exactly where you need to do your presentations, where you need to sit down and write your newsletters, where you can sit down and start creating blogs. Can you imagine what that must be like?
Gill Moakes (34:38.664)
Right.
Gill Moakes (34:42.344)
That's what's fascinating for me. So for people listening, yeah, I mean, you're absolutely bang on. Imagine being able to plan that out. You know, for all of us who get obsessed with our content planning, how about a bit of life planning around when you're gonna, when things are gonna feel more natural to you and when they're not. Because that's what it's about, isn't it? Things are gonna either feel aligned and natural or they're gonna feel misaligned.
Abi Adams (34:45.046)
Yeah.
Abi Adams (35:07.03)
soon.
Gill Moakes (35:11.56)
and off. So what about people like me though? Because obviously it's all about me. Never mind. OVs, it's all about me. So what about people like me who, you know, I'm getting on for probably, I don't know, quite a while since my last period. I did think that I'd come to the end recently, but yeah, then I had like a random one off.
Abi Adams (35:13.526)
Yeah, absolutely.
Abi Adams (35:19.51)
Oops, oops.
Gill Moakes (35:40.648)
But I'm definitely coming to the end. So I can't go away and log the length of my cycle or anything like that because I really don't have a cycle now. How can I apply this in terms of planning? Is this where the lunar cycles are going to come in for me? Yeah.
Abi Adams (35:56.278)
Yeah, so this is where you look at the lunar cycle. So you've got your new moon represents the bleed and menstruation and ovulation represents, sorry, the full moon represents ovulation. And you've got your 28 day cycle there. So you've got 14 days, one side, 14 days the other. And so this is from menstruation, from new moon to full moon, this is...
Gill Moakes (36:11.4)
Right.
Abi Adams (36:24.118)
that what you would class as that building, bubbling, creative side, the more energetic side, then I call this the waxing side. From full moon to new moon, this is your waning side. So this is where you start to introvert once more and come back round again. So you just look to use those both sides and tune in and tune into how you're feeling. Like I said, there's so many women that look at this first off and give it the old, okay, whatever, a bit woo woo.
Gill Moakes (36:29.734)
Mm -hmm.
Gill Moakes (36:42.214)
Mm.
Abi Adams (36:54.134)
And then when they do it, they realize just how much they can actually feel the change in when they're paying attention. It's phenomenal. Cause let's, we forget, you know, we are, what is it? 70 % water. The moon has such a strong pull on these tides. And as Jane Hardwick Collins would say, prior to, yeah, prior to, um,
Gill Moakes (37:02.568)
Yeah.
Gill Moakes (37:12.52)
I never thought of that. I never thought of that.
Abi Adams (37:19.734)
Prior to electricity being created and having all of these wonderful lights in the house, our cycle was governed by the moon, obviously, and women would bleed on the new moon and they would ovulate on the full moon because of the intensity of the moon on the pineal gland. And obviously we wasn't as inside as much and we didn't have electricity. Jane Hardwick -Collins tells a story about the moon.
Gill Moakes (37:46.632)
Yeah, yeah, of course.
Abi Adams (37:48.982)
but the moon would make us bleed on the new moon and it would make us ovulate on the full moon. And then once electricity came in, we've just changed our rhythm completely. And I find that fascinating. So there's been many occasions where women that are in their perimenopause, they're still cycling, but all of a sudden the cycle goes out and it's 40 days long. I encourage them to dim those lights.
Gill Moakes (38:00.296)
Mm. Mm. Mm.
Abi Adams (38:16.63)
to get outside each night for five minutes and look at that dark sky. And you, all of them had said, just the relaxation that that creates and how it helped them sleep better because they wasn't having all these lights on and they was taking five minutes each night for themselves outside. It's a game changer. And like I said earlier, they seem so simple, these tools, but they are the most profound, most profound.
Gill Moakes (38:22.76)
Mmm.
Gill Moakes (38:48.872)
The more simple things are, for some reason, the more resistance we have for trying them. Which is just nuts really, isn't it? Like, however anti -woo you are. And I'm not that much of a woo -woo person, but... And also woo -woo, I always think that's so insulting. I feel like, if you are woo -woo, you're allowed to say it. If you're not that woo -woo, you can't really say it without sounding like a bitch.
Abi Adams (38:56.47)
Bye bye.
Gill Moakes (39:19.632)
Leave that in Luna. They know I'm a bitch anyway. But it is true. It's like, this isn't anything to do with being woo woo. This is about being a woman and being open to just thinking about things a little bit differently. Just trying and educating yourself around things that perhaps maybe don't aren't things that you've always embraced.
But I know for me, I'm absolutely fascinated by this conversation. I really am. Abby, how can people join Project Women? Like, how can people become part of your world? Because I think they're gonna want to.
Abi Adams (39:47.454)
Absolutely.
Abi Adams (40:03.126)
Thank you, my darling. So we cater, our core values and all the pillars and everything else that you get to are community, which is our online community, the Project Woman Collective, where we have the greatest of conversations and content. Just think kind of like Loose Women or the BBC of News for females, where we've got great resources, we've got great people to support you. But more importantly, it's about you having the space.
to speak freely as a woman. It's also a place of fun where we've got our own female health travel agent that will help you travel with your family or on solo retreats. It's like having everything under your fingertips for a woman. We've got the online collective. We've then got the Project Woman TV, which again, all great conversations and content around core subjects that make us feel alive. And then we've got the Project Woman weekends, which at the start of every season,
Gill Moakes (40:44.034)
Love it. Brilliant.
Abi Adams (41:00.31)
We encourage and support women to take time out to refuel, recharge, refresh and revitalise every cell in their body so they can go back out feeling as passionate as the day they was born. A woman to that!
Gill Moakes (41:13.788)
Wonderful. And what's the website? Because I know people are going to want to rush there to have a good old stalk.
Abi Adams (41:24.182)
So you'll see it's www .weareprojectwoman .com. The monthly membership is 16 pound 50 or you can do annually for 178 which saves you 20 quid. Yeah, that is it.
Gill Moakes (41:35.208)
Brilliant. I urge you listeners, please go and check this out. I'm going to put the links obviously in the show notes, you know that. Abby, this has been a really different conversation for this podcast and it has been absolutely fascinating. And so it just feels like a really important conversation. And I thank you for making it just so accessible for us. You're amazing.
Abi Adams (41:51.626)
OOPS
Abi Adams (42:02.774)
Well, thank you for giving it air time. I appreciate it. And thank you so much for listening, you gorgeous humans.
Gill Moakes (42:06.342)
No.
Gill Moakes (42:09.8)
Thank you for coming on. Speak to you again soon. Bye for now.
Abi Adams (42:13.398)
Cheers, love. Thanks, love.
